#159 The Proposal

by Amelia Jane Nierenberg

Once, I had one hundred imaginary dogs and my nursery school classmates decided to have imaginary dogs too. Siddhartha decided to have imaginary elephants instead with names filled with letters strung together like the pretty glass beads my teacher wore around her neck. I liked Siddhartha because he always shared his crayons.

Once, Justin, who lived in my grandmother’s building and showed me how boys could pee standing up, told me he was eating my imaginary dogs. I watched him bring his grimy fingers up to his mouth and ran away angrily. Loneliness tainted the rest of my day, and I kept turning my head to look mournfully behind me as I walked, now void of one hundred imaginary puppies that always frolicked in my wake.

The next day, he came up to me again. “Yum, yum, yum,” he said, gnashing his pearl-white teeth together around the necks of my dogs. “Your dogs are delicious.”

“Nuh uh,” I retorted, my hands planted firmly on my hips. “I left my dogs at home today. You’re eating imaginary worms.” Justin, who wore batman underwear and always scored in kickball, stared at me with his mouth open as I walked away triumphantly knowing that his stomach was now filled with imaginary worms.

Justin asked me to marry him at recess the next day. But unfortunately for Justin, I had already asked Siddhartha, who had very politely, said yes.


Another Government Employee said...

Love it. Exactly what a eight year old girl would say.

Deb said...

This is just fabulous. LoveLoveLove

Unknown said...

That's so lovely.

Anonymous said...

I like the originality of this and the entirely authentic shift to marriage proposals the next day. Slightly magical as eight year old beliefs are. Wish I'd wished worms on the little horror who used to chase me with cap guns!

Laura Howe said...

Loved the tables being turned in this light-hearted tale.